飛翔的天堂鳥

Danielle is starting middle school tomorrow.  She asked to talk to mom before bed.

在美國的初中，有些學校是從六年級開始。上了初中就沒有固定的班級、教室與班導師，隨著不同的課有不同的老師、同學和教室，好像我們以前的大學選課一般。對於習慣了小學生活方式的孩子，乍入初中真是很緊張的事。開學前一天趕緊帶女兒去校園逛一圈，熟悉教室的位置，吃午餐的地方，廁所在哪裡等等。

After dinner, Danielle asked mom: What do you want the person I want to marry to be like?       l

昨天我開車帶女兒去初中註冊，天氣炎熱又拖著我的腳痛，過程不順母女多有口角。回程她打電話給爸爸，第一句話就是：”Daddy! Mommy is not in good mood.”疼痛中眼看與醫生約好的時間將要遲到，看了醫生又會來不及送女兒去空手道。一邊開著車子一邊湧出所有的挫折感。兩週前探訪之後車子刮傷進了車廠，上週無理頭冒出一件官司，現在莫名的腳傷被迫要休息兩週才能銷假，急救證書月底到期而原先報名的課因病假無法參加，我想我的臉色一定很難看。但想到我受苦中的姊妹，面對的不僅是身體疼痛，更是生死交戰，心靈的掙扎，我這又算什麼？

雖說生命中的危機可能隨處可見，但自己的神經好像「比較大條」，生活中的起伏彷彿沒有「衝擊信仰」的感覺。唯有回想非常特別的1996那年，我在美國的親人除了丈夫之外，就是我的姑姑和奶奶。我與自己和與他們之間有糾纏不清的危機。

"When we believe that reality is confined to only what we see, we become prisoners to our perceptions." ---- by Jon Walker

This is a very first time in my life.  I cannot believe I was literally emotionally melting down at work today.   I pray and pray for a comfort from the above.  I cry out I cannot end my day and go to bed without peace.  And here is the message “Letting Go of the Eternally Useless”.  “Your time on earth is not the complete story of your life. You must wait until heaven for the rest of the chapters. But, the truth is, you will not be in heaven two seconds before you cry out, "Why did I place so much importance on things that were so temporary? What was I thinking? Why did I waste so much time, energy, and concern on what wasn't going to last?"”  ---- Thanks to pastor Rick.  God is faithful.  Yes, I should let go of the eternally useless.

星期四那天一接到女兒看他無精打采的，就問他今天在學校還好嗎？女兒說他好累喔，我說今晚早點睡吧！